I sit here right now feeling a flood of emotions washing over me. Feeling a bit disconnected from them, as perhaps they are more than I am able to process at one time.
As I observe my mind, I feel somehow disconnected from them. And I wonder if this is a self-preservation mode that has kicked in, or if my practice is simply allowing me the acceptance I need right now.
I think that I have finally learned that one cannot control other people. No matter what their words or actions may be, no matter how hurtful or destructive, I cannot control anyone. And I think this is a huge part of acceptance and mindfulness.
This does not mean I am devoid of emotions or feelings, only that I have gained enough wisdom to not only accept things as they are but to also see that all things are impermanent.
There is suffering in this life, and the stronger my aversion is to it, the greater I will suffer.
This is a moment in my life that I must practice loving kindness and compassion to the self.
If I do not do this, I see clearly that I will have nothing to offer others.
Even in the seemingly darkest hours of suffering, Bhante’s instruction to accept, be mindful, and cultivate, always resonate as the rudder for my ship on the stormiest of seas.
May you each have peace and acceptance for yourself. Be mindful of your thoughts and actions. And live as a loving, kind and compassionate being.
May you be well, happy and peaceful
