Anger management – Buddha style


Think about the angriest person you know. Is it you?
Maybe not, perhaps it’s a friend or loved one. Perhaps it’s an enemy who seems to really despise you.
Why all of this anger? What causes anger in ourselves and in others?
Well I think there are several reasons, but perhaps the most common one is fear.
Fear is a powerful emotion, and can present itself in many different ways with many different faces.
So let’s start by looking at ourselves, and what makes us angry.
I think it usually occurs when someone does something we don’t like. But why is that?
Because we wish to control others, and have things our way.
This is the whole idea of self that the Buddha talked about. And why he says we should let go of the self.
It’s the “self” that has ego, and the ego makes your wants and needs the most important in the World.
Do you think that’s right? Are you the most important person, above all others? Are you supremely knowledgeable and powerful, and all should obey you?
Well, your ego believes this to be true. And the fear of losing control, not having it your way, turns to anger – even rage.
We are so self-absorbed, that we become like a child having a temper tantrum. We no longer see clearly at all, because our vision is blinded by hostility.

Now if you can see that this is what is happening in your own mind, then you have a window in what is making others act this way towards you.

If you are able to let go of your ego in that moment of anger, you may just see that it fear and self importance that have given rise to these feelings.
And with just one breath, you can let go of this attachment and bring yourself back to a place of peace and understanding. Compassion, and loving kindness.

Once you begin to witness these events in your own mind, you can begin to see others more clearly.
With compassion, patience and acceptance, you will begin to feel love for these people who have so much anger for you.
This is the way to not only heal yourself, but to heal others.

So be mindful of your emotions as they arise. Do not add a story to your feelings, which is only a way to add fuel to the fire.
Put out these fires in your mind with love, kindness, compassion and acceptance.
You will truly be making the World a better place.

May you be well, happy and peaceful.