Bad things happen for good reasons

bad
I think that all of us know what it feels like to be going through a bad time in our life.
Things like illness, divorce, financial problems, death of a loved one, loneliness etc.. These are times that I believe we can all relate to.
But this morning I realized that these things all happen for good reason.
Reflecting on my own past, I can share with you a few examples in my own life that demonstrate this clearly.
Going back to my early youth, the divorce of my Mom and Dad was absolutely devastating to me as young boy of eleven.
But my Father was an alcoholic, and having him removed from my life actually helped me. It also created a stronger bond with my Mother and Sister. We became an extremely close and loving Family. We were like the three amigos, always helping one another and protecting each other always.
This traumatic event was actually a blessing, but one that I could not see at the time.
Then as a rebellious teenager, I dropped out of High School to join the Navy. I knew I needed someone to kick me in the pants and put me on the straight and narrow. The Navy did not work out, and I was honorably discharged after only two years. I have often looked back and felt that it was a shame, because I would have made a good career Navy man.
But had I not gotten out when I did, I would not have met my first Wife. And had I not met her, my Daughters would never have been born! Had they not been born, my two beautiful Grandsons would not exist today!
You see, the bad thing of quitting High School, leaving the Navy, all led to the greatest blessings.
Later in my life came the divorce from the girls Mother. This too felt as bad as most anything I had ever been through in my life. Yet were it not for this, I would never have met the beautiful woman that I am blessed to share my life with today.
Twelve years ago, the unthinkable happened. My Mom died. She was my rock, my Angel, the one who loved me unconditionally, and accepted me always. She only saw the very best in me, and always believed in me.
What could possibly be the good reason for this to happen?
Well, because it was time. It was Moms time to move on, and let me stand on my own. She gave everything and taught me so much, but it was my time to be the adult. This too I believe was time for my older Sister to begin the next chapter in her life. She got married two years ago, and if Mom were still alive I think she would still be single and taking care of Mom.

So you see, I truly think that every apparent “bad thing” that happens to any of us- happens for a good reason.
We only lack the wisdom and acceptance to see this at the time.
And as much as I think it’s wonderful that I am able to see this now, the Buddha showed us the way to see this as it happens.
Can you imagine, being happy that you are getting divorced or filing bankruptcy? How about smiling that you have been diagnosed with Cancer?
Seems unimaginable doesn’t it! Seeing every event as a gift, an opportunity.
But this is truly available to each and every one of us. The bliss of true acceptance embraced with loving kindness.
With practice, we can see and accept the nature of all things. We can breathe in suffering, and breathe out compassion and love. Our own nature can become pure and connected.
This is my prayer for you, and for me.

May you be well, happy and peaceful.

11 comments for “Bad things happen for good reasons

  1. ParkRidgeDDS
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 7:14 am

    Beautiful. And thank you for being so open…it is exactly that openness on your blog that encourages others to share…there is no judgement and that creates trust. I had to smile because, finally, this was a post that didn’t hurt my brain as much…and I know that the reason for that is that I have believed this always. I have always known that there are gifts behind every ache, disappointment, hurdle, pain and fear. In times of great pain, it may take me a while to get to that place within that understands that there will be blessings but, it is something I am aware of. As I face the daily challenges that arise in business and scheduling and balancing, I can actually create a place of calm within if I stop and remember that all is good and that I will get through this. Actually, when I was a little girl and I was worried about something, my Mom would always say to me the phrase “no matter what happens, dinner will still be on the table” As a child, I thought that everyone’s Mom must tell their children that and that it was a common phrase AND I took it literally, as children do. As I grew up, I started using it and found that while no one recognized it, it served a very real purpose…it became a sort of metaphor for my belief that good really does happen from seemingly “bad” things. Because, at the end of the day, no matter what happens, the metaphorical dinner will still be on the table…and, if I paid enough attention, I will see the blessings through the pain.

  2. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 7:20 am

    I really like your Mom’s expression Claudia. It’s strange how I look back at my own Mom’s ways and lessons now, and it seems she was a wonderful Buddhist (even though she was Catholic). :)

  3. jared.a.edwards
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 10:28 am

    wow. How incredibly insightful and introspective. The picture you chose for this is perfect as well. I hope that we would all take the time to follow the ripples.

  4. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 11:07 am

    Thank you so much Jared @jared.a.edwards

  5. ParkRidgeDDS
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:23 pm

    @jared.a.edwards That is such a great thought…to take the time to follow the ripples….

  6. ParkRidgeDDS
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:25 pm

    @WHPDave I think that there are a lot of people who follow the Buddhist philosophies and either integrate it with their comfort level within their religion OR they don’t even realize that they ARE following a Buddhist path and live a magnificent Buddhist-like life…

  7. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:31 pm

    You are so right Claudia. There are some great Buddhists out there that don’t even know they are Buddhist! @ParkRidgeDDS

  8. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:47 pm

    @ParkRidgeDDS You are so right Claudia. There are some great Buddhists out there that don’t even know they are Buddhist!

  9. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:48 pm

    @jared.a.edwards Thank you so much Jared

  10. WHPDave
    Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 2:50 pm

    @ParkRidgeDDS I really like your Mom’s expression Claudia. It’s strange how I look back at my own Mom’s ways and lessons now, and it seems she was a wonderful Buddhist (even though she was Catholic). :)

  11. john
    Wednesday, July 24, 2013 at 6:21 am

    agree

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